One of my greatest weaknesses is being a people-pleaser.
I have a long history of giving away my power to others, putting everyone else’s comfort and needs before my own, putting my goals and action steps at the bottom of the list.
It’s taken a lot of work to break through these people-pleasing tendencies.
How many times do we go through life not focusing on the activities and steps that will take us to our goals and dreams?
How often are we putting these action steps aside to make sure everyone else’s needs are met before our own?
How often do we tamp down our needs to please other people? How often do we give away our power to others?
Breaking through our people-pleasing tendencies takes a huge shift in mindset.
We’ve been conditioned throughout our lives to put others’ needs before our own, and this is exacerbated exponentially when we become mamas. We’re always doing whatever we can for our kiddos and our partners, oftentimes leaving no time for us to get our own tasks done.
By the time we even have time to think about our own needs, we’re completely exhausted and burnt out. How can we possibly find the time to think about self-care to combat our mental stress? How are we supposed to find a spare minute to food prep or do some form of exercise to help relieve our autoimmune triggers?
We need to learn how to shift our mindset to understand that we can’t pour from an empty cup. By continuing to put our own needs on the back burner to constantly please other people, we’re draining our energy to the point where, even trying to take care of our kiddos’ basic needs, we’ll be too exhausted to actually meet those needs.
So, how can we shift our mindset? How do we learn to fill our own cups, so we can pour back into others?
For me, visualizing what it is that I really want and need, and taking a minute out of my day to write it down, journal about it, has helped to make me see – yes, this is what I need. Seeing it on paper, I can then go to – ok, what is one step I can take to fulfill this need? Do I need to speak up to my partner about what I’m lacking? Do I need to put an episode of Blippi or Bluey on the TV to occupy the kids for a few minutes?
It’s not an overnight change that occurs. Mindset is a hard thing to change. But starting to take those small, baby steps to shift your thinking can make a huge difference in your burnout and can help you start to regain your power and end your people-pleasing tendencies.
Need help with figuring out where to start with shifting your mindset? Shoot me a message and we can chat about what might work best for you.