We’ve spent our lives thus far in a state of socially awkward anxiety.
Our mindset is firmly in the realm of never belonging. We’re so used to being in this head space, that we struggle to break free. We have put up so many mental fences to try to keep ourselves safe, that we barely recognize ourselves. We don’t really know who we are anymore.
So, how do we break down those fences, dig into the deep dark recesses of our minds, and truly come to terms with the reality of who we are?
It’s going to take time. It’s going to take work. And it’s going to bring up a lot of emotions that you may not be fully ready to confront.
So, let’s get one thing straight.
Take the time. Take as much time as you need. And put in the work that you need to put in.
There is no set timeline that you have to follow when it comes to figuring out who you truly are. Make your own timeline and give yourself the grace you need through this process.
Only you can do the necessary work to confront the emotions that will come up, so you need to do it on a timeline and in a way that is safe for you.
That being said, you will need to put in the work needed to address these emotions, walk through the fences, and truly take stock of where you are, who you are, and how much and how deep you’re hiding your true self in your hopes of being granted belonging.
You’ve spent years, potentially decades denying who you are to yourself, trying to be someone that you’re not. So, it’s going to be hard work doing the deep digging that you need to do to identify who you are at your core. It’s not an overnight process. You need to find a methodical, practical way to focus your energy, gather your stamina, and be prepared for it to take time, sometimes months, sometimes years, to reverse the years you’ve spent burying yourself.
This is a continual process. Even when you unbury your true, core self, you have to keep up the work, the energy, to keep yourself above ground.
How will you start this process for yourself? Come share with us in our community of weird, nerdy women, or in the comments below.